10 Sponsors Who Will Be Contacting Michael Phelps Soon
After the news of Michael Phelps being a pothead came out over the weekend, it seems like that’s been all people can talk about lately. I don’t really know what the big deal is though. The dude is 23 years old. If you can show me one 23 year old who doesn’t smoke and I can show you 50 more that do.
Fortunately for Phelps, his sponsors are backing him up and not dropping him. They probably smoke too.
Not only is Michael Phelps not losing his current endorsements but here are some new sponsors that he should expect to hear from soon.
Visine
Phelps’ script: “Gets the red out no matter where the red came from. Pool water, lack of sleep, smoking. You name it.”
White Castle
Phelps’ script: “The spot to hit when you have the munchies. Better smoke some more afterwards as air freshener though because you will be fartin up a storm.”
Doritos
Phelps’ script: “Not quiet White Castle but it will do if your high ass doesn’t feel like driving.”
Axe
Phelps’ script: “You don’t want to look AND smell high do you?”
Altoids
Phelps’ script: “Curiously strong mints for people who smoke curiously strong substances”
Oakley
Phelps’ script: “If your gonna hide being high, might as well look cool doing it.”
Zig Zag
Phelps’ script: “For when you just can’t put you hands on that bong.”
Dutch Masters
Phelps’ script: “For when your smoking with your hood friends.”
Tempurpedic
Phelps’ script: “After you satisfy the munchies, this is your next stop”
Red Bull
Phelps’ script: “Most smokers other drug of choice. Best used the next day to avoid grogginess.”
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3 Comments
Carmen
02.04.2009
What a fun piece, is about time this kind of
literature expresses again.
The comment was so funny and right on.
Michael Phelps, you are a great athlete, a true hero
and in other times the people would concede anything
to a hero, because that person had gone beyond the
ordinary.
Peace C
coffee
02.04.2009
Dear News of the World magazine:
You Suck.
~*Hilda*~
02.05.2009
LMFAO I could just hear phelps in that calm voice doing the endorsements…… no wonder his voice is so calm….. I think this goes to show that being a pot head is not necessarily bad. I think its like anything else in the world, you must use in moderation. Even too much water can make you sick.
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