99 Ways I Would NOT Want To Die
What is one way you would NOT want to die?
Normally I don’t write about things like this, but the thought of it occurring to me, of course while high. The first thought that popped into my head was drowning.
Which would suck.
After thinking more about it and getting help from my friends on twitter, came up with this immense list of horrible ways to die. I should warn about a couple of things before reading this though. One is, it contains some graphic scenes and language that might completely blow your high. Two, some of there are far fetched like #77, but they are all possible.
- Drowning in the ocean
- Getting attacked by a Great White Shark
- Hurricane

- AIDs
- Car accident
- Dehydrating
- Internal bleeding
- Being Curb Stomped
- Lung Cancer
- Spontaneous combustion
- Falling off of a Roller Coaster

- Being dragged by a truck
- Food poisoning
- Being stung by lots of bees/wasps
- Getting acid thrown on you
- A full grown Gorilla mauling you to death
- Being scalded
- Being burned alive

- Snake bite
- Accidentally shot by an arrow
- Being electrocuted
- Bird flu
- Swine flu
- Regular flu
- Quicksand
- Being attacked by a lion
- Overheating
- Scalping

- Ingesting glass
- Buried in cement
- In surgery
- Being stuck in a well
- Drowning in the pool
- Choking on your own vomit
- Being attacked by an alligator
- Being stranded on an island
- Walking the plank
- Gettin cut in half by a propeller
- Being washed out to sea
- Being attacked by piranhas
- Being eaten by pigs
- Choking on some good food
- In an explosion

- Rabies
- West Nile virus
- Being trapped in a meat locker
- Malaria
- Run over by car
- Lynched
- Alcohol poisoning
- Drug Overdose
- Being eaten alive by a komodo dragon
- Being chopped up
- Being locked in a room until you die
- Bleeding to death
- Elevator accident
- Falling in a meat grinder
- Being buried alive
- Something really heavy falling on you
- Throat cut
- In childbirth
- Being on a bridge that collapses
- Being shot in the stomach
- Being smothered
- Untreated gangrene
- Sky Diving accident
- Having you face beaten in
- Infection
- Being on a concentration camp
- Tornado

- Dying on life support
- Severely stabbed
- Run over by a train
- The gas chamber
- Being struck by lightning
- Being crushed by an elevator
- Being strapped to a rocket
- Being slowly poisoned in small amounts
- Stranded on another planet
- Bungee jumping accident
- Imploding
- Getting impaled through your anus
- Drowning in the bathtub
- Anything involving a chainsaw

- Mountain climbing accident
- Dying in a desert
- Crushed by closing walls
- Suffocation
- Rupturing a vital organ
- Tied to a train track

- Being anywhere near an volcano eruption
- Falling
- Being pinned down by something really heavy
- Slipping in the bathroom and hitting your head
- Choking on a quarter
- Floating aimlessly in space
- Earthquake

- Being shot in the face with a nail gun repeatedly
- Waterboarding




















6 Comments
DJ Diggity
06.07.2009
ANYTHING involving a chainsaw? I mean, what if you had just ALMOST finished having the most earth-shattering sex of your life, and for some God-forsaken reason had a chainsaw sitting on the bookshelf next to your bed, and it was shaken loose by your furious banging and managed to clock you in the melon, causing a previously-unnoticed brain aneurysm to pop at the EXACT moment of orgasm…? Would that be okay? In other news, God, I smoke too much pot!
houroc
06.18.2009
theres no such thing as too much pot if u ask me
420365
06.30.2009
Just don't die dude.
Honestly, I'd rather do any of these things than get thrown in a sealed air tight little machine where they take the handle things and try to get the stuffed animal out. That would suck. That's not even bad ass.
except maybe getting scalded alive or flayed or made into wax.
emily
07.29.2009
i really don't care how i die, as long as it's quick. i actually want to die in some crazy way.
heysayyes2drugz
07.30.2009
i'm not worried about me dying , i am worried about killing other people. i have a quick temper and low tolerance of stupidity.
jade
08.28.2010
ew thats actuall made me not want kids cause uu sid in child birth :O
and a chansaw ewewew
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